It has been over a year since I took my last final of college. Now when I think about it, it has been over a year since I’ve written anything over a paragraph (so bear with me lol). I felt compelled to write this blog post after talking with many of my former teammates and friends about their life after graduation. If you have followed my YouTube channel over the past year, you know I have been all over the place trying to navigate my life after leaving the Eug. 365 days ago I was living in Atlanta working a 9-5 job and training for my first 10k race after college. Now, I am living in San Diego working for myself and training for my first marathon. Sometimes I feel like my life is all over the place, and I can’t keep things straight. I often wish I had a straight-forward path that showed me exactly what I should be doing at 22 years old. But I don’t think that exists, ha!
The biggest challenge for me after graduating has been my relationship with the sport of running. For most of my college career, I told myself “I will never run a step after my last race in the NCAA.” Things changed when my YouTube channel became a huge part of my life. Suddenly I felt I needed to prove something, to myself and to my loyal subscribers. I didn’t want to just “give up” after graduating, especially on the sport I dedicated literally my entire life to up until that point. I honestly didn’t even know how to give up and move on cold turkey!
To some of you, maybe it feels like hanging up the spikes after your last collegiate race means you are giving up everything you have worked for so far in your lifetime. I felt that way as well, with the added pressure of a social media following looking to see what I do next in my running career. The reality was I left college burnt out, needing to take a break, but I felt so uncomfortable and out of place not running that I jumped straight back in. In the back of my mind I knew was I wasn’t ready, but I wasn’t sure what else to do! Adults and former competitive runners around me told me to take time off – years off even, before the love of running found me again. I envied those who’s love for running kept them competing and training after college, seemingly effortless!
This blog post is for the 90% of competitive runners who don’t go on to sign a running contract after graduating. It’s hard when you open Instagram and you see the 10% of your former teammates repping big running brands and running insane times. But where is everyone else you used to train and compete with? I can’t count the number of former athletes who I have talked to who have struggled with the post-graduation identity crisis. Going from having a team, a set workout and racing schedule, to the freedom of being on your own can be scary. Even a year later, I don’t feel I have found my place in the post-collegiate running world. I love running, but do I want to dedicate my life to training like a professional? Do I want to get a 9-5? Do I even like running? These are the things I think about on a daily basis.
So, to my fellow recent graduates who don’t know what path to choose, just know you are not alone. Though you may not see people posting on social media blabbing on about their post-grad struggles (like me lol), I want you to understand that there are so many athletes that feel the same exact way as you. Reach out to your former teammates and see how they are doing. Talk to older athletes and ask them how they overcame this stage of their athletic career. Just know – everything happens for a reason, and everything will be okay. If anyone needs someone to talk to, feel free to shoot me a message through my contact page and tell me your story. And if anyone has any advice on this stage of life, I’d love to hear it, it would be much appreciated :)